How To Siam Women's Test
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Your relationship with your girlfriend is sailing along -- you're having fun, there isn't a lot of fighting, and the sex is good. Everything seems to be working quite nicely.
But then, out of left field, she tosses you a hand grenade: she accuses you of having an affair with the new girl at work. A girl you've exchanged maybe ten words with.
After you finish picking your jaw up off the floor, you deny her accusation, but she's pouty, sullen. "I can't believe you're destroying our relationship," she tells you. "What is it? I'm not pretty enough for you anymore?"
Desperate, shaking your head in disbelief, you try to pour oil on troubled waters by apologizing for something you never did in the first place.
But it's too late. The sex is cut off. And it's only after innumerable phone calls, flower deliveries, and humiliating begging that you manage to restore harmony.
For something you never did in the first place.
What the hell happened here?
Well, my friend, you were just a victim of "The Test." And you failed it miserably.
the nasty tests women dish
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Women are like spoiled children. They are self-focused, insecure and irrational. They crave drama and games. They demand constant attention, reassurance, and above all, power in relationships. And, like children, who ceaselessly push limits to see just how much they can get away with from their parents, women relentlessly test men.
Just how do women test? Here are a few examples:
Canceling or changing plans at the last minute. Not returning phone calls (even though she's interested in you). Finding fault with your clothes, hair, car, etc. and pressuring you to change them. Pouting when you want to spend time with your buddies. Bringing up the dreaded "Where do you think this relationship is going?" question. Acting bratty, bitchy, demanding, dramatic, picky, or manipulative to see if you will put with it. Testing to see how nice you are (will you back down or change your behavior to suit her?). Expecting you to ask for permission before doing any "guy stuff." Blatantly flirting with other men in front of you. Accusing you of doing things you didn't do. Threatening to leave or end the relationship if she doesn't get her way. Blaming you when you call her on her behavior. Making you jump through all sorts of hoops. Asking "no-win situation" questions ("Does this dress make me look fat?" ). Playing hard-to-get -- pretending she's not interested in you when she really is, and then expecting you to keep pursuing her. Not answering questions directly/expecting you to be a mind reader and then blaming you when you're not. Withholding sex and making you beg for it.
"The Test" is all about control. Since women already know they control relationships with sex, they are experts at manipulating men. Their power base is granting and withdrawing attention and access to their "favors" (while making sure they extort a hefty price).
But they need more -- they need to know that their control is absolute. So they test men to see how far they can push them, to see just how much they can get away with. They test to see how insecure men are, to see how desperate they are for sex (to determine how much they can exploit them). They test to see how much they've been able to feminize men (for example, forcing them to express emotions) and so make them more controllable.
They test to reassure themselves of their physical attractiveness, to see if they can still wrap men around their fingers with their sexual power. They test to provide drama in their lives by provoking unnecessary fights and arguments.
Testing is a woman's way of keeping a man off-balance, of keeping him dancing to her tune like a puppet on a string. This is why, as soon as a man reacts to The Test by getting angry, giving in, or apologizing, he has failed. He's lost the relationship game and handed over all his male power, forever doomed to be the groveling wuss-boy who will kneel down and take anything his woman dishes out. And she loves it.
Thinking you can't win? Don't be so sure.
slam on the brakes
Here are a few tips to put the brakes on her manipulative tests:
1- Develop a test "radar." Be on the lookout for the items in the list above. Remember; it is how a man reacts to a woman's testing off the bat that will determine the course of the relationship. Once you become aware of what she's doing, it will be much easier to stop it before it starts.
2- Never get angry at her testing, and never apologize for your behavior (assuming you've done nothing wrong) -- if you do, you'll lose instantly.
3- Test her back! Try using her own tests against her and see how she reacts.
4- Stand your ground at the outset. At the first inkling of a test, put your foot down, and keep it down. Tell her that you refuse to be tested. Explain to her that if she wants to be with you, then she'll have to knock off the childish power games.
5- When all else fails, walk away. Go out and look for a woman who doesn't need to test you and who genuinely appreciates you. This is your ultimate power as a man, and the ultimate "pass" of her tests. -
This is my check list. Guys do yours if your ex or gfs does the listed. Canceling or changing plans at the last minute. Not returning phone calls (even though she's interested in you). Finding fault with your clothes, hair, car, etc. and pressuring you to change them. Pouting when you want to spend time with your buddies. [Check] Bringing up the dreaded "Where do you think this relationship is going?" question. [Check] Acting bratty, bitchy, demanding, dramatic, picky, or manipulative to see if you will put with it. [Check check Check unlimited checks] Testing to see how nice you are (will you back down or change your behavior to suit her?). [Check] Expecting you to ask for permission before doing any "guy stuff." [Check Check] (this is getting irritating...how much so zhun one!) Blatantly flirting with other men in front of you. [Check] Accusing you of doing things you didn't do. [Check check] Threatening to leave or end the relationship if she doesn't get her way. Blaming you when you call her on her behavior. [Check] Making you jump through all sorts of hoops. [Check] Asking "no-win situation" questions ("Does this dress make me look fat?" ). [Check] Playing hard-to-get -- pretending she's not interested in you when she really is, and then expecting you to keep pursuing her. Not answering questions directly/expecting you to be a mind reader and then blaming you when you're not. [CHECK!] Withholding sex and making you beg for it. [Hmmm..]
I think i've went into the relationship with wrong women. Or is it me?
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eheh sorree bro i didn't read it after the first intro paragraph, which admittedly made me spew coffee all over my LCD screen at work becos it was pretty damn funnee!!
to sum it up, the woman can test all she wants and i will never admit to something i didn't do. i will never suck up to unreasonableness and i certainly will not apologise TO unreasonableness.
i'll tell her to look in the mirror and when u're ready, i want my roses. yes, men love to receive flowers too.
relns should NEVER be tested this way. the failures are those that do the "marking"..... -
Wahhhh lauuu......if i'm a ger.....i sure fall for you leh.Originally posted by jOhO:eheh sorree bro i didn't read it after the first intro paragraph, which admittedly made me spew coffee all over my LCD screen at work becos it was pretty damn funnee!!
to sum it up, the woman can test all she wants and i will never admit to something i didn't do. i will never suck up to unreasonableness and i certainly will not apologise TO unreasonableness.
i'll tell her to look in the mirror and when u're ready, i want my roses. yes, men love to receive flowers too.
relns should NEVER be tested this way. the failures are those that do the "marking".....
You bery MAN(Nan Ren!!!) ah!!!!
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I juz had my ¡°test¡± last week, flunked it completely, here¡¯s how it started¡Â
We were toking about planning a short holiday to bali and decided to pool our money together, She suggested we open a joint account so that we can save up the cash we need for the trip in that account. I agreed instantly. No sooner than I tot she started the test.
Previously I left a considerable sum of cash with her for safe-keeping. Her test was, she told me she had supposedly spent all that money and now had none¡Âthe cash btw was for her makeover session. Of coz I got angry (immediate failure here), I asked her if she was kidding me (failed again) she said she wasn¡¯t bluffing¡ÂI got fed up coz I tot she spent the money wastefully, she claimed it was on food, couldn¡¯t believe she spent it all on food in less than 2 weeks¡ÂI juz couldn¡¯t believe it, my face turned black cause it seems she nvr told me she was using the money for food when she could have told me she needed money and I would promptly given to her, instead of waiting till now the very last minute (I failed again). Then she started accusing me of only wanting my money back and got worked up over nothing and said I failed her test. OMFG I got super pissed now, coz not only did she create something out of nothing she started to doubt me and said that she tested me to see if we shld open a joint acct together. I flew immediately into another rage I started raising my voice coz I felt it was so absurd (I failed AGAIN!) she told me to take my money back and keep it! I tried explaining to her why I got mad but she still insisted on her version. I tried reasoning that I didn¡¯t value money over her she refused to listen.
At the end of it I got so tired of explaining myself, I juz gave in, apologized and pleaded with her like mad, saying I was wrong and blah blah blah¡Âand I failed her test and such and im not ready for a joint acct¡Â*hello whose idea was it in the first place??!!? Sometimes I juz give up¡Ârather not fight wif them..make my blood boil and vormit blood oso¡ -
Pat pat....hey bro.Originally posted by L@gSoN:I juz had my ¡°test¡± last week, flunked it completely, here¡¯s how it started¡Â
We were toking about planning a short holiday to bali and decided to pool our money together, She suggested we open a joint account so that we can save up the cash we need for the trip in that account. I agreed instantly. No sooner than I tot she started the test.
Previously I left a considerable sum of cash with her for safe-keeping. Her test was, she told me she had supposedly spent all that money and now had none¡Âthe cash btw was for her makeover session. Of coz I got angry (immediate failure here), I asked her if she was kidding me (failed again) she said she wasn¡¯t bluffing¡ÂI got fed up coz I tot she spent the money wastefully, she claimed it was on food, couldn¡¯t believe she spent it all on food in less than 2 weeks¡ÂI juz couldn¡¯t believe it, my face turned black cause it seems she nvr told me she was using the money for food when she could have told me she needed money and I would promptly given to her, instead of waiting till now the very last minute (I failed again). Then she started accusing me of only wanting my money back and got worked up over nothing and said I failed her test. OMFG I got super pissed now, coz not only did she create something out of nothing she started to doubt me and said that she tested me to see if we shld open a joint acct together. I flew immediately into another rage I started raising my voice coz I felt it was so absurd (I failed AGAIN!) she told me to take my money back and keep it! I tried explaining to her why I got mad but she still insisted on her version. I tried reasoning that I didn¡¯t value money over her she refused to listen.
At the end of it I got so tired of explaining myself, I juz gave in, apologized and pleaded with her like mad, saying I was wrong and blah blah blah¡Âand I failed her test and such and im not ready for a joint acct¡Â*hello whose idea was it in the first place??!!? Sometimes I juz give up¡Ârather not fight wif them..make my blood boil and vormit blood oso¡Â
Learn your lesson and improve lah. Better tell her to not play you again.
I believe there are alot of guys in the forums suffered before.
Well...just afraid to share?
Chey....!
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hey bro...after fifth time reading thru.Originally posted by jOhO:eheh sorree bro i didn't read it after the first intro paragraph, which admittedly made me spew coffee all over my LCD screen at work becos it was pretty damn funnee!!
to sum it up, the woman can test all she wants and i will never admit to something i didn't do. i will never suck up to unreasonableness and i certainly will not apologise TO unreasonableness.
i'll tell her to look in the mirror and when u're ready, i want my roses. yes, men love to receive flowers too.
relns should NEVER be tested this way. the failures are those that do the "marking".....
Will you not try to please the women you love wih all your heart?
And will you not give in?
I find it hard to imagine if any guy could profess their true love yet can also ask her to look at the mirror and wait to recieve flowers.
Share your thoughts with me? -
wtfOriginally posted by L@gSoN:I juz had my ¡°test¡± last week, flunked it completely, here¡¯s how it started¡Â
We were toking about planning a short holiday to bali and decided to pool our money together, She suggested we open a joint account so that we can save up the cash we need for the trip in that account. I agreed instantly. No sooner than I tot she started the test.
Previously I left a considerable sum of cash with her for safe-keeping. Her test was, she told me she had supposedly spent all that money and now had none¡Âthe cash btw was for her makeover session. Of coz I got angry (immediate failure here), I asked her if she was kidding me (failed again) she said she wasn¡¯t bluffing¡ÂI got fed up coz I tot she spent the money wastefully, she claimed it was on food, couldn¡¯t believe she spent it all on food in less than 2 weeks¡ÂI juz couldn¡¯t believe it, my face turned black cause it seems she nvr told me she was using the money for food when she could have told me she needed money and I would promptly given to her, instead of waiting till now the very last minute (I failed again). Then she started accusing me of only wanting my money back and got worked up over nothing and said I failed her test. OMFG I got super pissed now, coz not only did she create something out of nothing she started to doubt me and said that she tested me to see if we shld open a joint acct together. I flew immediately into another rage I started raising my voice coz I felt it was so absurd (I failed AGAIN!) she told me to take my money back and keep it! I tried explaining to her why I got mad but she still insisted on her version. I tried reasoning that I didn¡¯t value money over her she refused to listen.
At the end of it I got so tired of explaining myself, I juz gave in, apologized and pleaded with her like mad, saying I was wrong and blah blah blah¡Âand I failed her test and such and im not ready for a joint acct¡Â*hello whose idea was it in the first place??!!? Sometimes I juz give up¡Ârather not fight wif them..make my blood boil and vormit blood oso¡Â
I'd be like "Fuck u!" LOL! -
His gf la. Don't be so mean can anot.Originally posted by boariggy:wtf
I'd be like "Fuck u!" LOL!
Scold also cannot scold until so vulgar.... -
i wish i could say that...but cant lah...shes a girl leh...it b quite rudeOriginally posted by boariggy:wtf
I'd be like "Fuck u!" LOL!
but sometimes damn tu lan, shes wrong i have to admit im wrong, in the first place shldnt ask me if she was expecting me to answer in a particular way, watched the Simon crowell Coke commercial? the one with the mafia telling him what to say? well..if my gf wanted me to answer in a certain way then she shld juz write it out, and not throw a fuss when i answer something totally different from what she had in mind...chik kek...
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Oh yes i'd give my heart and do my all for the one i love.Originally posted by M©+square:hey bro...after fifth time reading thru.
Will you not try to please the women you love wih all your heart?
And will you not give in?
I find it hard to imagine if any guy could profess their true love yet can also ask her to look at the mirror and wait to recieve flowers.
Share your thoughts with me?
but will the one i love test me like that? that's the question. or even more appropriate question: will the one that LOVES ME test me that way?
i tell u something, i'm a pretty idealistic person. some pple abhor ideals. all i can say is being idealistic hasn't put me in any problems. (idealism could lead to optimism which could lead to disappointment) becos i have a pretty strong emotional structure to keep me in check. i've only been broken once ever in my life, and i am utterly disappointed at myself for that.
loving deep doesn't mean hurting ALOT when it ends. it doesn't have to be.
anywayz, back to it, i think understanding is a very important thing. of course, nothing's to say that the girl i love may wake up one more all insecure and wanting to test me, EVEN after knowing that i will be totally upset if she did. so... she still does. if u're in love, and u've been together for a while (being idealistic again) you would understand each other pretty well, and be able to tell she's insecure, and she able to tell that u KNOW wat she's up to. and u nip the problem in the bud.
when they know u love them, all they need to hear are the right things. REFUSE to go thru the test, but nip the problem in the bud when u sense something and soothe her insecurities. if the test is let drag for too long, there's something wrong with the "unwritten" communication between the two and perhaps the reln isn't that stong.
of course... there are TONNES of relns out there like that (not strong), so how? i dunno... hope that she won't test u until the reln becomes strong? ahahha...
i dun have answers to everything ....
oh i refer back to my above post. i refuse to suck up to her and apologise for something i didn't do doesn't mean i won't be gentle yet resolute in how i handle the situation. i believe sometimes girls just get too emotional and they really don't know wat they are doing. i mean not as in they are blind or deaf or stupid. but they get confused sometimes and if u understand her.. set her straight. tell her: you are feeling this way BECOS blah blah, you are doing this BECOS blah blah... and u need not feel this way BECOS blah blah...
women choose a man they can rely on. if u can think on their behalf and decipher them even better then they can themselves, don't u think they will stick by u for support, since u know them so well? they want to feel safe, and safety is in knowing her man knows how she feels and that he loves her enuff to do wat is required to handle those feelings. it's all about emotions, deep down in a woman.
of course.. all that CRAP i just wrote, is almost impossible to do. but KNOWING where u need to go, the direction to get there, is important. u might not be able to do so now, but if ur direction is right, u might get close. but many guys are just clueless, so that's where relns are fragile.
and.. of course these are just my humble opinions.
seldom post long post anymore.. *phew*
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Originally posted by M©+square:His gf la. Don't be so mean can anot.
Scold also cannot scold until so vulgar....
Okay -
damn... jz got my ass kicked by the test... ~sianz~
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wtf....get into a relationship still got test.
man i aint giving a damn towards these or watever tests she had for mi...asking mi to give in toward all this shit...hell no i m a man ok -
why must there be a need for these type of games? perhaps, it's the way women think?
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ASk the women to answer here then.
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we shld test them back...
personally i dun see the need for tests?!!
y test us when u can juz ask? anyway i think employin the use of test is the wrong way of gettin an honest answer out of guys. -
I will. As soon as I understand all that's being written. x___xOriginally posted by M©+square:ASk the women to answer here then.
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You poor, poor man. :p You have my sympathies.
I think most tests are motivated by insecurity. She doesn't know for sure, so she comes up with a harebrained test to find out.
But generally these tests stop when the relationship gets more long term and stable, no?Originally posted by L@gSoN:I juz had my ¡°test¡± last week, flunked it completely, here¡¯s how it started¡Â
At the end of it I got so tired of explaining myself, I juz gave in, apologized and pleaded with her like mad, saying I was wrong and blah blah blah¡Âand I failed her test and such and im not ready for a joint acct¡Â*hello whose idea was it in the first place??!!? Sometimes I juz give up¡Ârather not fight wif them..make my blood boil and vormit blood oso¡ -
Hi to presumably 'all guys'
well, as u noe it takes two hands to clap?
guess some of u & partner have been trying to get it going.
hmm, guess there's no right & wrong way to go abt in a relationship ..
but i believe that there must be a certain amount of trust, level of communication, care & concern existing between the guy & girl
So frankly speaking, the 'MARKINGS' has got to go for any couple who want to strenghten their relationship.
i'm presently in a relationship 4 a couple of yrs & as my boy always say ..
'A relationship is like a heartbeat, wif ups & downs, when its up, u must always be prepared to go down ..'
Life is really short, and we really don't know how its gonna end for every one of us
Sure, each of us may get jealous or insecure now & then [that's when u r tempted to start those silly markings] ..
but isn't better to grab of that certain partner[who could b wif u 4 life], stop, ponder & reflect to get over that blasted lil' hurdle
i'm no expert , juz typing from experiences i made thru wif my boy
all the best -
Originally posted by M©+square:
Here are a few tips to put the brakes on her manipulative tests:
1- Develop a test "radar." Be on the lookout for the items in the list above. Remember; it is how a man reacts to a woman's testing off the bat that will determine the course of the relationship. Once you become aware of what she's doing, it will be much easier to stop it before it starts.
Bad move... What if you're not so good a 'radar'? There might be much misinterpretations, doubts and miscommunications.. Besides.. If you don't do well as a 'radar'... You'll probably wear out in time to come... Dragging the relationship DOWN with you...
ESPECIALLY a BAD move if you're an OVERLY SENSITIVE guy...
3- Test her back! Try using her own tests against her and see how she reacts.
Might not be such a smart move.. Probably testing the patience and tolerance of both parties... If FAILED, both parties' gonna be SUFFERING for it...
4- Stand your ground at the outset. At the first inkling of a test, put your foot down, and keep it down. Tell her that you refuse to be tested. Explain to her that if she wants to be with you, then she'll have to knock off the childish power games.
BAD MOVE. Refer to '1'. -
With all been said n discussed, it really depends on the couples, it take 2 hands 2 clap. so whether u cannot tahan such stupid tests or tried 2 make up when u failed the tests. Each halves shld know the patience limit of their significant others. Well if women r reponsible 4 such tests, then they better know how far they can jolly well push the buttons of their respective men.
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These days i would test it on female friends and or potientals to find out if their 'that sort'
Practise makes it sharper day by day.
I may agree being over sensitive, bad radar receptor is a bad idea afterall. Then that depends on the methodolgy of him onto preventing his gf's test. -
A SUSPECT. A SUSPICIOUS. It works BOTH WAYS....Originally posted by M©+square:These days i would test it on female friends and or potientals to find out if their 'that sort'
Practise makes it sharper day by day.
I may agree being over sensitive, bad radar receptor is a bad idea afterall. Then that depends on the methodolgy of him onto preventing his gf's test.
Think about a relationship without trust? A pot calling the kettle black? -
That would greatly depends on what methodology men uses to draw out the nature of the girl whom he interacts.Originally posted by Devil1976:A SUSPECT. A SUSPICIOUS. It works BOTH WAYS....
Think about a relationship without trust? A pot calling the kettle black?
A Suspect - A suspicious - Pot calling the kettle black.
I haven't get into a relationship as yet. So i wouldn't tell you if i'm the pot or not. What i understand is, till now. I've not yet seen a girl(maybe just one in my life) who is honest and mean truly of what she've said.