Using Women's Intuition to Observe Girls
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Great article. Next time, get a galfriend to join you for Babe-watchin activities. I'm goin to have fun observing this weekend.
Using Women's Intuition to Observe Girls
I was out with some friends a few weeks ago, and I was talking with my friend's wife about my recent dating experiences. She is a relationship therapist, and we regularly talk about our opinions on dating and male-female dynamics. She gives me the "textbook" or more formal point of view, while I hit her with a more informal but real-life opinion. We often disagree, but that's the fun of it. I love hearing how things "should" be, and watching for the gap between that and reality.
We were talking about the possibilities in the bar we were in (a trendy San Francisco bar called Palominos, where the most beautiful women gather after hours.) My friend - I'll call her Rose for the sake of this article - started to pick out women she thought I would be interested in long-term.
(Mind you, she also ignored the fact that I had just said that I wasn't interested in marriage, only dating around. More on this in a minute.)
I would just pick women by appearance, pretty much at random. The typical male approach, right ? We get interested by what we see. Appearance is what we use initially to pick our targets. It's not because we're superficial (as many women like to say), but that we've been programmed by evolution to size up a woman based on her ability to demonstrate her physical health and ability to bear young. Typically we see this in a body of certain proportions, good hips/large breasts, good teeth, white eyes, etc.
Now after I picked a woman out of the crowd, my friend Rose took a look at her and said, "Oh, no. High maintenance. You don't want her."
This stopped me in my tracks.
How did she know that she was high-maintenance just by looking at her, and for only a second longer than I had ?
I stopped for a second and double-checked the woman I had picked. Sure enough, after watching her behavior, I started to understand how she could be thought of as high-maintenance.
First, she was very rigid in her posture. She had a serious look on her face. And even when she smiled to her friend, it looked a bit strained, like she was trying to keep up an appearance. Plus, she looked as if she'd spent about two hours on her appearance. Overall, she just looked like she wasn't very FLEXIBLE. I could imagine taking her out somewhere and hearing her nitpick about the unimportant details.
Sure, this may have been a case of judging a book by its cover, but you know what I've noticed? Most people can be sized up pretty quickly by their "cover." Sad but true. We just don't trust our intuition as much as we should.
Then, Rose pointed out another gal. "Her," she said. "That one is low-maintenance."
I checked this gal out, and she was even attractive to the eye. (The first thing a man notices.) Then I watched her a little longer and noticed that she also gave off an easy-going aura. She seemed to laugh freely and un-self-consciously. her body movements were relaxed and calm, not uptight and controlled. She was dressed nice, but it didn't look like she had to spend a couple hours applying make-up and picking out just the right clothes.
Her cover wasn't as slick and polished as the last woman's, but something in my gut told me she was much more relaxed and probably easier to talk to. Low maintenance.
Now, I'm sure I would have been able to figure out even more about these two women if I'd had a chance to talk to them both as well. Still, it was an eye-opener to see how women are able to pick up on these things in person.
Now the lesson here is two-fold :
1) Women are incredibly good at reading body language and interpreting a person by the way they behave. If you think you can sneak past a woman's defenses, you're nuts. She'll sniff you out faster than old pork in a trash can in summer. You've got to learn how to carry yourself around women of all ages and experience levels.
Why ? Because she will be able to figure out in a few short minutes what you're really made of. And, even if she isn't quite as good at describing the reasons why she thinks you're whatever she makes of you, she will FEEL it. And she'll trust that feeling for all it's worth.
2) You can pick up on these signals, too. Women are intuitive and perceptive about these things, but it's a skill you can learn as well. The signals are subtle, yet understandable. You can save yourself a lot of pain by reading a woman's visual cues to tell you about her personality and what kind of a woman she is. -
one of me and yu fu's fav hobbies is to look at ppl....guys and gers.....then mouth itchy will wanna rate and comment.....
when i go "yeeeeeeee" he will go "wow!"
when i say "woohoo~ this one good" then he will say "yeeyeerrrr!"
i guess guys and gers have perspectives when it comes to looking at other ppl, own kind and otherwise......
to add....
guys will rate on exterior, while girls will usually read the details and deduce tt person's character......from the dressing, body lang....
women are more sensitive in general, and go by feeling most of the time.....which some guys read as being jealous or zealous.....
i have many guys frens who walked the yuan wang lu....
i have warned them about the ger they are interested in....mainly base on first impression........but they still wanna be with them.....then when the true colors come out then they realise im right...........hai~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ -
1) Women are incredibly good at reading body language and interpreting a person by the way they behave. If you think you can sneak past a woman's defenses, you're nuts. She'll sniff you out faster than old pork in a trash can in summer. You've got to learn how to carry yourself around women of all ages and experience levels.
hahaha.. interesting article.
but still, there wont be that many relationship problems if this is true.
perhaps women are really good in reading people. however, knowing how to use these information correctly is another story... -
Can there be some fatal exceptions...just like our defence system fail to detect HIV.
I know at least 2 womanizers who are so good in rendering the women defenseless.... -
Bro, precisely.Originally posted by www:hahaha.. interesting article.
but still, there wont be that many relationship problems if this is true.
perhaps women are really good in reading people. however, knowing how to use these information correctly is another story...
Women @ clubs, pubs, KTV, or streets are not for marriage purpose. Only a minority a difference.
That is why RELATIONSHIP is never a keyword here.
Women are a good guide(guidance) to have. so that we can learn to also see other details other then what men always sees and missed the important details.
I wanna learn something out of it.
There's a SMU bash tonight. My gal-friend and i going there to see see look look.
Practice starts tonight. -
Yes, bro. You're right. They've understood certain principles in dating.Originally posted by FreeToFly:Can there be some fatal exceptions...just like our defence system fail to detect HIV.
I know at least 2 womanizers who are so good in rendering the women defenseless....
Could you tell me what are the attributes you've observed that made them so 'successful'? -
call it the women's instinct...
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most women got their soft spot.......Originally posted by M©+square:Yes, bro. You're right. They've understood certain principles in dating.
Could you tell me what are the attributes you've observed that made them so 'successful'?
once the guy discover this....it's damn easy to win the ger.............
whoops~!
i jus revealed our vulnerability!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -
Men and Women are from different planets. Behave differently and see things in different perceptives. For more information read "Men are from Mars Women are from Venus"
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i lost my book...Originally posted by JeweL81:Men and Women are from different planets. Behave differently and see things in different perceptives. For more information read "Men are from Mars Women are from Venus"
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go buy!!! i thinking of buying a hard cover one, just to keep heheheOriginally posted by audlenelee:i lost my book... -
Well, for the few common things I know about them:Originally posted by M©+square:Yes, bro. You're right. They've understood certain principles in dating.
Could you tell me what are the attributes you've observed that made them so 'successful'?
1. They look at least decent
2. They are very good in sweet talking
3. They are the bad guys but knows how to play it nice
4. They know how to manage many women at the same time
5. One of them have a family history of such gene [off topic: his cousin was a bond girl]
6. They are quite well to do
7. They are predators, never stop hunting, or basta*ds are the right words??
8. Educated & street smart
9. One of them is very good in bed [testimonial from one of the ex-gf]
10. They know women inside out, they probably can write books about women
These are what I can recall, if those above sounds like tigers in the wild, rest assure that they are not in Singapore, put heart girls. -
I have that book.Originally posted by JeweL81:go buy!!! i thinking of buying a hard cover one, just to keep hehehe
But not usable for Dating lah! Only for relationship.
Nevertheless, it's a good tool to have when dating moves into Relationship. -
its a really good book. So as to understand why Men behave like that...Originally posted by M©+square:I have that book.
But not usable for Dating lah! Only for relationship.
Nevertheless, it's a good tool to have when dating moves into Relationship. -
Right on. Great Socialising abilities. Applied Law of Seduction and flirting techniques.Originally posted by FreeToFly:Well, for the few common things I know about them:
1. They look at least decent
2. They are very good in sweet talking
3. They are the bad guys but knows how to play it nice
4. They know how to manage many women at the same time
5. One of them have a family history of such gene [off topic: his cousin was a bond girl]
6. They are quite well to do
7. They are predators, never stop hunting, or basta*ds are the right words??
8. Educated & street smart
9. One of them is very good in bed [testimonial from one of the ex-gf]
10. They know women inside out, they probably can write books about women
These are what I can recall, if those above sounds like tigers in the wild, rest assure that they are not in Singapore, put heart girls.
One thing i wish to confirm>>>They're not the kind who'll talk about marriage and settling down right? They want to play, and have fun and getting a wife is almost Zero in their mind right?
Thanks for your sharing. It's great. -
Not forgetting on why Women behave like that too.Originally posted by JeweL81:its a really good book. So as to understand why Men behave like that...
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hahaha i can see this coming...Originally posted by M©+square:Not forgetting on why Women behave like that too. -
Think they can play it all, fling, lovers, steady....depends on what is best to get the girls....Originally posted by M©+square:Right on. Great Socialising abilities. Applied Law of Seduction and flirting techniques.
One thing i wish to confirm>>>They're not the kind who'll talk about marriage and settling down right? They want to play, and have fun and getting a wife is almost Zero in their mind right?
Thanks for your sharing. It's great.
Whether they are thinking of settling down now, not sure as I have not kept in touch with them for a long time, they are just acquintances by the way... -
Ark Kah Chew Ji!Originally posted by JeweL81:hahaha i can see this coming...
Of cos!!!You're my good buddy!
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but of coz ~Originally posted by M©+square:Ark Kah Chew Ji!
Of cos!!!You're my good buddy! 