dont know if this is the right place
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somehow just found out my ex(broke off about 9 mnths back) had a new gf.
they have been together for some time already. Only recently he decided to go open about it.
somehow had the gut feeling he wasnt really that into me while we were together. already had hte gut feeling he was two timing me.
bad hting is... it is somehow true... my frens was hiding it from me even though the truth was known to them. at least... they didnt get together while i was with my ex. they only got together 1 mnth or so after we broke up.
tat somehow feels cold.
ive been two timed 4 times.
is there somethign really wrong with me?
no.. im not angry with my ex. at least he ended one relationship b4 going into another. im just very disappointed.
till now... i have never done a thing to let any of my ex down. I know the pain of being cheated. I remained faithful.
i believe that its a gift to be together. There are many pple searching for love. Not everyone can be with the one they like. So if u are together and both have mutual love towards each other, its a blessings.
i know in every relationshp..there be problems..... i oso believe that theres a will theres a way. i did my best to maintain my relationship. i know its my duty n commitment to maintain it and to solve any problems tat may arise. but it wasnt really the case for my exs.
I know u nd two hands to clap. No point one doiing the job.
hai..pls tell me if theres something wrong with me...being two timed 4 times in a row is nt funny. haix. -
Did you learn anything from all your past relationships? Can you actually tell which guy is two timing or not? You are no Professor X of X-Men so you cannot read minds, BUT you definately can apply your experience when the next time you decide to go into another relationship.
Notice more about the guy you want to be with, know more about him, do not rush into a relationship without understanding what is he as a person and in character. I can only tell you from a guy's perspective and from my own views, there are other people who can give you more information.
I oso not sure is dis da right place to post your question...
Dear Mods, this da right place?
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This is not a wrong place to post.
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Seems like you always land on the wrong selection of guys.
Maybe it's not wrong(not your fault), but so happen that they just couldn't resist two-timing?
It could be quite possible that you're the reason they two time?
We can't be too sure until you're willing to share more.
Cheers -
well... i believed they two timed cos our common frens tipped me off.somehow felt it myself. and one case....the girl came to me and told me wat my ex was doing behind my back. sigh.
case 1: he clubs alot. i dont. then he comes more n more secretive. hiding his hp all the time. then my god bro saw him with another girl. hinted to me. didnt believe. b4 i know it...he left for the other le.
case 2: he wooed two girls at hte same time. so yea. -.-""" again its common frens who tipped me off.and i felt it myself too.always talking about tat girl this..tat girl that. hais. wanted to be together..but i dropped him cos i know his heart got another girl. dont wan waste time.
case 3: he wooed another girl while with me.... and tat girl (my fren) finally took the courage to tell me after we broke. she even let me look at their mirc logs all these lors. kns. tat girl didnt say anythign to me back then while we still otgether cos our frenship nt tat close.
case 4: he simply start to lose interests in me. then start to go out more often with frens. then start to club. then ya..the rest is like a repeat.
yeah..i do learn from past experiences. so i tend not to repeeat the same mistake.
i know i have my short comings.
is my judgement tat poor? -
I dun tink your judgement is DAT poor... I can only say (sorry if it sound cruel or bad), you fell sucker to these kind of guys. BUT I believe some day you will find the guy who deserve your love as you deserve his. Till then enjoy single hood!Originally posted by babyreyes:well... i believed they two timed cos our common frens tipped me off.somehow felt it myself. and one case....the girl came to me and told me wat my ex was doing behind my back. sigh.
case 1: he clubs alot. i dont. then he comes more n more secretive. hiding his hp all the time. then my god bro saw him with another girl. hinted to me. didnt believe. b4 i know it...he left for the other le.
case 2: he wooed two girls at hte same time. so yea. -.-""" again its common frens who tipped me off.and i felt it myself too.always talking about tat girl this..tat girl that. hais. wanted to be together..but i dropped him cos i know his heart got another girl. dont wan waste time.
case 3: he wooed another girl while with me.... and tat girl (my fren) finally took the courage to tell me after we broke. she even let me look at their mirc logs all these lors. kns. tat girl didnt say anythign to me back then while we still otgether cos our frenship nt tat close.
case 4: he simply start to lose interests in me. then start to go out more often with frens. then start to club. then ya..the rest is like a repeat.
yeah..i do learn from past experiences. so i tend not to repeeat the same mistake.
i know i have my short comings.
is my judgement tat poor?
Cheers! -
I'm sorry to see that you've gone through so mush of similiar situations.Originally posted by babyreyes:well... i believed they two timed cos our common frens tipped me off.somehow felt it myself. and one case....the girl came to me and told me wat my ex was doing behind my back. sigh.
case 1: he clubs alot. i dont. then he comes more n more secretive. hiding his hp all the time. then my god bro saw him with another girl. hinted to me. didnt believe. b4 i know it...he left for the other le.
case 2: he wooed two girls at hte same time. so yea. -.-""" again its common frens who tipped me off.and i felt it myself too.always talking about tat girl this..tat girl that. hais. wanted to be together..but i dropped him cos i know his heart got another girl. dont wan waste time.
case 3: he wooed another girl while with me.... and tat girl (my fren) finally took the courage to tell me after we broke. she even let me look at their mirc logs all these lors. kns. tat girl didnt say anythign to me back then while we still otgether cos our frenship nt tat close.
case 4: he simply start to lose interests in me. then start to go out more often with frens. then start to club. then ya..the rest is like a repeat.
yeah..i do learn from past experiences. so i tend not to repeeat the same mistake.
i know i have my short comings.
is my judgement tat poor?
Not that your judgement is poor. I would say that you're quite dense and not sharp enough.
It could have been your mild character that have made you a passive, and non confrontational person.
When you mention about your cases. Did you actually know your former boyfriend's background and history?
Getting more information and findings from his speeches and conversations, friends he have and his habits could tell you alot about him. And how much he's interested in you.
Of cos, the contridictions of sterotyping is always hovering along this line.
That is why, the best way/method to engaging a relationship is to know yourself, your strength and then throw your potential off composure so that he'll be always chasing after you and only interested in you.
You lack experience in knowing yourself and fine tune your senses.
Cheers -
BBreyes, on a SIDE track, pak tor MC square lah!Originally posted by M©+square:I'm sorry to see that you've gone through so mush of similiar situations.
Not that your judgement is poor. I would say that you're quite dense and not sharp enough.
It could have been your mild character that have made you a passive, and non confrontational person.
When you mention about your cases. Did you actually know your former boyfriend's background and history?
Getting more information and findings from his speeches and conversations, friends he have and his habits could tell you alot about him. And how much he's interested in you.
Of cos, the contridictions of sterotyping is always hovering along this line.
That is why, the best way/method to engaging a relationship is to know yourself, your strength and then throw your potential off composure so that he'll be always chasing after you and only interested in you.
You lack experience in knowing yourself and fine tune your senses.
Cheers
Pls dun kill me! -
Originally posted by Bontakun:BBreyes, on a SIDE track, pak tor MC square lah!
Pls dun kill me!
Why not avail yourself? -
Well... coz I wanna love GOD and myself 1st before I tink I am worthy enuf to love other ppl. Chim hor?Originally posted by M©+square:
Why not avail yourself? -
Placing God above all else is right, infact, it's a Christian first and foremost duty.Originally posted by Bontakun:Well... coz I wanna love GOD and myself 1st before I tink I am worthy enuf to love other ppl. Chim hor?
Yes very chim lah... -
Muah ha ha ha! So Babyreyes, while you think abt MC sq, do think about what you have learnt and what you can do now with your given singlehood. There is no knowing when you may get attached to a better man. So enjoy! Like mee~~~Originally posted by M©+square:Placing God above all else is right, infact, it's a Christian first and foremost duty.
Yes very chim lah... -
the 1st two guys.. i know htem only like 2 mnths. well..the usuall saying fast start fast end.Originally posted by M©+square:I'm sorry to see that you've gone through so mush of similiar situations.
Not that your judgement is poor. I would say that you're quite dense and not sharp enough.
It could have been your mild character that have made you a passive, and non confrontational person.
When you mention about your cases. Did you actually know your former boyfriend's background and history?
Getting more information and findings from his speeches and conversations, friends he have and his habits could tell you alot about him. And how much he's interested in you.
Of cos, the contridictions of sterotyping is always hovering along this line.
That is why, the best way/method to engaging a relationship is to know yourself, your strength and then throw your potential off composure so that he'll be always chasing after you and only interested in you.
You lack experience in knowing yourself and fine tune your senses.
Cheers
the last 2 i actually know them at least 7 mnths to 2 yrs. hmmx.
how to fine tune my senses? lolx. -
yesh.. im still hoping to find a better man.Originally posted by Bontakun:Muah ha ha ha! So Babyreyes, while you think abt MC sq, do think about what you have learnt and what you can do now with your given singlehood. There is no knowing when you may get attached to a better man. So enjoy! Like mee~~~
wat disappoint me most is my last ex. his frens n my frens have good words for him. he was cheated b4 n hated pple who two timed. and i didnt expect him to do this to me.
ever since we broke up...he removed all the messages in his frenster. then put up a lot of pics of his currrent girl. well.. hais.
thanks to mc sq n bontakun for ur replies. -
Your duration of understand and setting up basic foundation is short. In your case, almost zero visiblity of where the relationship is going.Originally posted by babyreyes:the 1st two guys.. i know htem only like 2 mnths. well..the usuall saying fast start fast end.
the last 2 i actually know them at least 7 mnths to 2 yrs. hmmx.
how to fine tune my senses? lolx.
The fact is - not how long you know, but how much you know.
_
Fine tuning is not easy.
Some people can pick up and learn.
Some never learn cos they have mental block.
Meet friends who are intellectually sound and quick in SA(Situational Awareness)
That is if you could spot them.
Read up some books? Let me know if you're interested, i'll source for some titles.
Cheers -
Mee intellectually sound and quick... duh~~~Originally posted by M©+square:Your duration of understand and setting up basic foundation is short. In your case, almost zero visiblity of where the relationship is going.
The fact is - not how long you know, but how much you know.
_
Fine tuning is not easy.
Some people can pick up and learn.
Some never learn cos they have mental block.
Meet friends who are intellectually sound and quick in SA(Situational Awareness)
That is if you could spot them.
Read up some books? Let me know if you're interested, i'll source for some titles.
Cheers
( -__________-)
BBreyes, slowly bah. you will know more as you go. Juz dun be too hasty in jumping into the relationship boat.
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relak lar, the right one hasn't come yet that's all.
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babyreyes, I'm curious to know how old are you and those guys you dated and in all 4 cases, was it always the guy who courted you(ie.you never took the initiative in any of those 4 relationships)?
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all started from age of 16.... my present age is a secret. =XOriginally posted by walesa:babyreyes, I'm curious to know how old are you and those guys you dated and in all 4 cases, was it always the guy who courted you(ie.you never took the initiative in any of those 4 relationships)?
yea..they courted me lors...
bb reyes don tknow how to woo guys de.... ever wooed 2..both fail. wahaha..
i think shld start having a standard questionaire...then use it as a guide whether a guy is true with me.. -
thank you kopiOriginally posted by kopiosatu:relak lar, the right one hasn't come yet that's all.
but bb reyes dont know how to see whether a right guy is a right guy or a wrong guy is a right guy or a right guy is a wrong guy...
=X -
Originally posted by babyreyes:all started from age of 16.... my present age is a secret. =X
yea..they courted me lors...
bb reyes don tknow how to woo guys de.... ever wooed 2..both fail. wahaha..
i think shld start having a standard questionaire...then use it as a guide whether a guy is true with me.. You can try and then let me know if it works after you get married.
If it works, i'll start tailoring my own questionaire too. -
wah using me as guinea pig.Originally posted by M©+square: You can try and then let me know if it works after you get married.
If it works, i'll start tailoring my own questionaire too.
*pengx* -
I'm just hinting to you that it wouldn't work.Originally posted by babyreyes:wah using me as guinea pig.
*pengx*
vv -
poor gal... sometimes its jz the luck... but u should look at the kind of guys u choose as bf or accepted... maybe all same style tat will 2time.... or ask urself hv u do enuff to keep him focused on u? dun lose heart there are better men out there so dun make the same mistake...Originally posted by babyreyes:somehow just found out my ex(broke off about 9 mnths back) had a new gf.
they have been together for some time already. Only recently he decided to go open about it.
.....
I know u nd two hands to clap. No point one doiing the job.
hai..pls tell me if theres something wrong with me...being two timed 4 times in a row is nt funny. haix. -
Hmm..can't comment much since I don't know your age, but anyway, since your relationships started at 16, I suppose it's fair to say most of those guys who courted you aren't really the mature ones who have thought about settling down? Moreover, the fact that you did not take the initiative in all 4 relationships could indicate the process of courting you was perhaps more of a challenge to those guys than actually having you as their gf...Originally posted by babyreyes:all started from age of 16.... my present age is a secret. =X
yea..they courted me lors...
bb reyes don tknow how to woo guys de.... ever wooed 2..both fail. wahaha..
i think shld start having a standard questionaire...then use it as a guide whether a guy is true with me..
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4 times liao.. be wiser.