He says he loves me but...
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He says he loves me alot but he wants me to choose between him and my social life.
He wants me to give up my friends (guys and gals, tht means no more casual yam chas with them). He said its possible as he gave up his social life for me and he expects me to do that for him.
What should I do? -
i'm sure u'd regret it if u obey his commands...
c'mon, doing that doesnt mean u'd have a solidfied future with him... he do first and u muz follow??! he muz b kidding, he is not ur mother or father, dun b too blinded by love, my dear... it doesnt pays to be change ur social life for a man who insist that 'rule' on u... he doesnt seem to respect or trust u at all...
the problem with men is their need to posses a woman... u juz haf to trust my words, ger... i've been thru and there, truth to be told, u'd be sick of his commands very soon and imagine that for a lifetym (if ur relationship works out) !! Spoiling him only, and more excuse for u to lie to him so very often...
u are not born to be a slave to love...
anywayz, no offence to anyone and so sorry if i sounded too harsh... gud luck !!
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There are better men out there
One that would not require you to give up anything or anyone for him, but one who would accept you just the way you are, friends included -
give him the finger n tell him that even both of u r together u still need friends and social activities... if he wans, compromise can be arranged as maybe u spent too little time with him... he threatens, leave him cos this kind of guys not worth it...Originally posted by virce:He says he loves me alot but he wants me to choose between him and my social life.
He wants me to give up my friends (guys and gals, tht means no more casual yam chas with them). He said its possible as he gave up his social life for me and he expects me to do that for him.
What should I do? -
if you can give up your social life for him, then go ahead, he loves you alot, yes that is true, but he does not love you enough to allow you to have your own freedom.Originally posted by virce:He says he loves me alot but he wants me to choose between him and my social life.
He wants me to give up my friends (guys and gals, tht means no more casual yam chas with them). He said its possible as he gave up his social life for me and he expects me to do that for him.
What should I do?
and trust me, freedom is important in a relationship, unless you want the relationship to suffocate and die -
thanks for the replies.
actly, i agree with u guys...breaking up with him is just the matter of time... *waiting for the time bomb to explode*
we argued almost everytime i got back frm my casual outings with my frens(guys+gals). i asked him to join me, but he kindda dont respect my frens and said tht he doesnt knw hw to communicate with my friends. while i can easily talk and chat with his frens(mostly guys) when im out with him and his frens. i think mayb im more friendly eh?
hehe.. but often, he will "tease" me and says tht the reason tht i can get along with his frens is because his friends are handsome and he thinks i hav crushes on them. i got furious at times when he said tht, but when argued with him, he said he was actly teasing me nia and said im too sensitive + small gas.
i was like...wth? -
well, if u see e end coming then..think u are more or less prepared to know wat to do lah huh...
well, tis guy of urs is a Loser..spelt w capital letter L..
he is jus afraid of losing u, tatz y he wans to control u...in another words, he is jus selfish n self centered...if u give in to him, it will only make him more dominating in e r.s....actually he is jus standin on a v high n insecure spot..
he doesnt trust u enough, as lik u mentioned u guys argue even though u went out in a group...so i guess he doesnt allow u to go out one-on-one w a guy lo?
he doesnt repect and trust ur friends....
bacially, he is jus not mature enough la...guys can put gfs as their priority, but they jus cant understand tat gals need their company much more..to me, both friends n bf is as equally impt in my life...if he wans me to choose btw him n my friends..i wld basically ask him to F-off...
these type of pple jus need time to grow up n wisen up abit manz..actually..wisen up lots.. -
it's your life...you take control of it...who's he to take over ove ryour lfie and choices....Originally posted by virce:He says he loves me alot but he wants me to choose between him and my social life.
He wants me to give up my friends (guys and gals, tht means no more casual yam chas with them). He said its possible as he gave up his social life for me and he expects me to do that for him.
What should I do?
If he can do it, it's his problem....not yours... -
EVEN married couples need to have their own social life..Originally posted by virce:He says he loves me alot but he wants me to choose between him and my social life.
He wants me to give up my friends (guys and gals, tht means no more casual yam chas with them). He said its possible as he gave up his social life for me and he expects me to do that for him.
What should I do?
he gave up his social life for u ? is he so SURE ?
he is ridiculous ... -
hahaha..
thanks for all the support! i think i knw what im going to do.
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The advices here are enough. Glad that you've made your decision.Originally posted by virce:hahaha..
thanks for all the support! i think i knw what im going to do.
All the best.
Cheers -
A case of Isolation Relationship.
Anyone experience anymore of these kind of relationship?
Cheers -
hmmmm strange usually
gal wants the guy to give up social life ....
hmmmmmm -
In isolation cases. Either gender could play the tyrant.Originally posted by borgkilla:hmmmm strange usually
gal wants the guy to give up social life ....
hmmmmmm
Depends on who is more insecure.
Cheers -
the guy is Xiao Nan Ren
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Isolation Relationships.. dang... sounds a bit whackd relationship to me..Originally posted by M©+square:A case of Isolation Relationship.
Anyone experience anymore of these kind of relationship?
Cheers
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the question should be right u in love with him still?
If yes then there is nothing to be say to change your mind.
If not then maybe there is a chance to talk some sense into u. -
dump him..
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To a large extend. You're right.Originally posted by drx:the question should be right u in love with him still?
If yes then there is nothing to be say to change your mind.
If not then maybe there is a chance to talk some sense into u.
Cheers -
i still love him, but i think if he continues doing tht to me..i dont think im gonna stand him. mayb i'll just love him but i wont be togather with him...<-- do u guys think its possible? *wondering*Originally posted by drx:the question should be right u in love with him still?
If yes then there is nothing to be say to change your mind.
If not then maybe there is a chance to talk some sense into u. -
Originally posted by virce:i still love him, but i think if he continues doing tht to me..i dont think im gonna stand him. mayb i'll just love him but i wont be togather with him...<-- do u guys think its possible? *wondering*
Before i stand at anyone side...maybe...it is your social life that hes unhappy...did u talk to him about it?
Maybe your social life might be a bad thing to him and hes unhappy
~+Cheers+~
StarPuppy -
StarPuppy, U have a good point there.
I wondered about it few months ago, and I did talk to him about itÂ… he said he knw tht IÂ’ll not do something bad behind him but the main reason he wants me to give up my social life is because he thinks that I should be spending every minute with himÂ… because he said tht he wants to spend every sec with me, meaning he wants to stick with me all the time.He actly tried to make me stick with him all the time by saying heÂ’s willing to give up his social life for me, and he expects me to give up my social life too so that we can be together all the time. But recently, when I asked if he feels insecure, he said, he just dun trust my guy friends.
I told him to trust me while Im out with my friends and I invite him to join us. He promised tht heÂ’ll try his best and he said he might be joining me and my friends on our next casual outings.
So, weÂ’re giving it a try nwÂ…I hope everything goes fine. Hehe. Wish me luck! -
Good luck then! Try updating on your progress k?Originally posted by virce:StarPuppy, U have a good point there.
I wondered about it few months ago, and I did talk to him about itÂ… he said he knw tht IÂ’ll not do something bad behind him but the main reason he wants me to give up my social life is because he thinks that I should be spending every minute with himÂ… because he said tht he wants to spend every sec with me, meaning he wants to stick with me all the time.He actly tried to make me stick with him all the time by saying heÂ’s willing to give up his social life for me, and he expects me to give up my social life too so that we can be together all the time. But recently, when I asked if he feels insecure, he said, he just dun trust my guy friends.
I told him to trust me while Im out with my friends and I invite him to join us. He promised tht heÂ’ll try his best and he said he might be joining me and my friends on our next casual outings.
So, weÂ’re giving it a try nwÂ…I hope everything goes fine. Hehe. Wish me luck!
We wish to give you a hand when you need it.
I need to point out that this is clearly a isolation case.
I've been thru it before, the warped version.
Cheers -
It's heartening to know tt you make a point (in fact, many times) to try and ask him along and join your friends. That said alot abt you making efforts to make this r/s very transparent.
While r/s matters are important, portion of your time shld reserve for your friends too. Perhaps, the way he put his words across to you wasn't clear? Like Starpuppy mentioned... maybe it's his way of making u to spend more time with him.
Remember thou... as much as r/s is impt, friendship too. Cos if the chips are down on you, you still have close pals to fall bk on for the emptional support. -
Originally posted by BÃ¥seline:It's heartening to know tt you make a point (in fact, many times) to try and ask him along and join your friends. That said alot abt you making efforts to make this r/s very transparent.
While r/s matters are important, portion of your time shld reserve for your friends too. Perhaps, the way he put his words across to you wasn't clear? Like Starpuppy mentioned... maybe it's his way of making u to spend more time with him.
Remember thou... as much as r/s is impt, friendship too. Cos if the chips are down on you, you still have close pals to fall bk on for the emptional support. So touched.
Cheers