Sians Tabloids Weekly(sometimes have sometimes dont have) ONS Edition
Ever stood so long and felt so tired n numb in ur legs that you could just sit down on the floor in the middle of anywhere? Even if you are standing in a puddle of muddy grimy water?
Look no further, for STW will teach you in these easy steps in how to stand for one night without even feeling tired!
Steps to One Night Stand(ing)
[b]Step 1 - Check into our forums frequently.
Step 2 - Interact with the siansters/owls via forum threads.
Step 3 - Make yourself known POSITIVELY.
Step 4 - After you make yourself known, look out for the next upcoming outings to take part in.
Step 5 - Put your name into the outing name list (if present).
Step 6 - Make sure YOU GO.
At the outing
Step 1 - Bring a friend if you are introverted, preferably a pretty girl, a handsome guy or a hairy chest guy who is good looking. If you are extroverted, you can also bring along plenty of pretty girls, handsome guys and a couple of hairy chests apes along. If you wish to go alone, you are always welcome.
Step 2 - Make sure you are standing on both legs in order to conserve your energy for the rest of the night.
Step 3 - Do not hesitate to introduce the pretty girl(s), handsome guy(s) or those hairy chest ape(s).
Step 4 - Smoke. At this moment you would have spent about 45 minutes introducing your friends to us and weariness in your legs and lower back is creeping in, shift your body's weight to one leg and remain an upright non-slouching posture.
Step 5 - Include yourself into the group's conversations, so that you will have an idea how the group is like, what might be happening next. Ie. Listen and react. As you listen you can shift your body weight from one to leg to another, but please do not have big movements, do it inconspicuously and naturally, hey you want to stand the whole night right?
Step 6 - Dont be afraid to make jokes, it can be really cold or something nobody understand, at least in da future people can refer to you as, "Oh! That one ah... the jokes cannot understand one izzit?!" Another point is also that you can take your mind off your tired legs and aching lower back by cracking your inbecile mind for jokes to entertain people, but the truth is you are just trying to move your body enough to relax your legs and lower back.
Step 7 - Smoke. At this point, it is advisable that you lean against something to conserve the energy for the next 10 hours. Wriggle your toes, your fingers or your nose! Whatever can take your mind off your weary legs. Remember any consipicuous methods of resting your legs are strictly prohibited ie. sitting or squatting.
Step 8 - Always include yourself in the group's activities (especially non-smoking guys).
Step 9 - Walk with the group, not in front or behind. Do not let people know that you are tired after all the standing, by walking in front you show you are eager and anxious to get to the next point of rest and by walking behind you are portraying weariness.
Step 10 - Show that you enjoy their company and make sure you mean it.
Step 11 - Always stay for supper and "aftermath" programs. If not they call OWLS for what?! In this case, remain standing, you have another 6 hours to go! Keep it up!
Step 12 - Let everyone know subtly when you are free to join them for their outings again, or you can always choose the, "EH! When is the next outing ah?! I very free leh!" Let people know how much you like to stand.
Now that you know what to do, go ahead! Join the outings, have no fear, 'cos you can always print this ultimate standing guide editon of STW and bring along with you for outings.
